Comfy Chaos

Last week I kicked off a new training program for the SJRNR half.  It’s based mostly on a Jeff Galloway plan - love him!  Anyway…the first few weeks are pretty easy, which is a good thing after last week.  I decided that a new training program needed a new running playlist, and one that’s a big longer too.

That said, here’s the new list.

• Tell Me What We’re Gonna Do Now - Joss Stone
• The Story - Brandi Carlile
• I Need To Know Where I Stand - Rhett Miller
• Happiness Is - The Verve Pipe
• Give Me The Meltdown - Rob Thomas
• Second Chance - Shinedown
• When I’m Gone - 3 Doors Down
• Low - Cracker
• Song 2 - Blur
• Brand New Day - Ryan Star
• Ride - The Vines
• Beautiful is Gone - The Ruse
• In A Whirlpool - Cactus World News
• Alcohol - Barenaked Ladies
• Mustang Sally - The Commitments
• It’s Your Thing - The Isley Brothers
• Everywhere I Go - The Call
• Wander This World - Jonny Lang
• Stepping Stones - G. Love & Special Sauce
• Beautiful Disaster - Greg Camp
• Antenna - Sonic Youth
• I Got You - Split Enz
• Turn On Tune In Drop Out With Me -  Cracker
• Closer To Fine - Indigo Girls
• You Can’t Always Get What You Want - The Rolling Stones

I’ve been working for a winery for a little over three and a half years now.  I’ve learned quite a bit about wine during that time, but wouldn’t call myself a wine geek.  I still have a lot to learn.  I’ve known the most important thing for awhile though - and that’s what I like and what I don’t.  In the end, if you don’t enjoy a glass (or bottle) of wine, then why drink it?

I’m not saying every glass has to be from an expensive bottle.  I’ve had some less expensive wines that were pretty darn tasty.  I’ve also had some pretty expensive wines that made me wonder what all the fuss was about.  And while we’re at it - if you wouldn’t drink a wine, then please don’t cook with it.  Do I really need to explain that logic?

We are in the process of temporarily downsizing our wine cellar at home.  We’re moving our 300 bottle cabinet, which has never been really full, up to our vacation home.  So, I decided to move what was left from our 300 bottle cellar to our new 50 bottle fridge.  While reorganizing our wines, I found several bottles that were likely past their prime, so I set those aside.  From now on, I’ll call them the nasty nine.

As I opened each one - with the exception of the one that had mold growing on top of the cork - I was treated to skunky bottle after skunky bottle.  If you’re not sure if you’ve ever opened a bottle that was past it’s prime, I’m pretty sure you haven’t.  Think wet dog or wet cardboard that makes your nose crinkle.  Got it?  Now, in all fairness, we’ve likely had some of these for 5-7 years, so some of them might have been reasonably good if we’d consumed them shortly after we got them.  When I looked at the bottles, I was 95% sure that we had not purchased a single one of them. I’m certainly not saying our friends gave us crappy wine, either.  

So what’s my point?  I’m not sure.  Other than, well, if it’s from the 80’s, just because it’s from France doesn’t mean it will rock.  At least not in a good way.

First off, I want to mention that I do just about everything possible to remove our household from as many junk mail lists as I can.  I’ve paid money to the Direct Marketing Association.  I gone online or called probably hundreds of catalogs.  I’ve gotten most of those silly credit card offers stopped.  Or so I thought.

Last week, we got two mailers announcing some Delta thing and offering us 25,000 bonus miles with a free companion ticket blah blah blah with American Express.  When I looked at who they were addressed to, I about fell over.  They were addressed to Petey (our cat) and Tasha (our former dog).

I decided to call American Express and find out what’s going on.  The first call went something like this…

AE:  Blah blah blah, how can I help you today?

Me:  I just received two applications for the Delta Sky Miles American Express and I have one question.

AE:  Sure, how can I help?

Me:  You can help by telling me how one credit card application got sent to our cat and the other got sent to a dog that hasn’t lived with us in about 5 years.

AE:  (silence…for a long time)

Me:  Uh…hello?

AE:  I’m sorry…what did you say?

Me:  I would like to know how to get my cat and dog removed from your mailing list since I’m pretty sure neither one of them qualifies for your credit card.

AE:  Oh, those people are off until Monday, but I can give you the number.

So…I wait through the weekend and call again.  

AE: Blah, blah, blah, how can I help you today?

Me:  You can tell me why your company sent credit card applications to my cat and my former dog, who, by the way, is probably dead.

AE:  That’s AWESOME!  Oh crap…I don’t mean the dead part…

Me:  Trust me, I know this sounds crazy, so go ahead and get it out of your system.

AE: (hand over microphone…cracking up - hey you guys, you’re not going to believe this call!)

Me:  So…you know, I could fill these out, but the cat honestly doesn’t have any income.  He doesn’t have a social security number or a checking account, in fact, he doesn’t really pull his weight around here.

AE:  What about the dog?  (you can tell he’s smirking)

Me:  Likely dead…thought we covered that?

AE:  Oh…right…

Me:  So…unless you now give cards to companion animals, dead or alive, how can we get them off the mailing list?

AE:  Let me transfer you…but here’s the number just in case you get disconnected.

The next person promised to remove my pets from their mailing list but said that it would take 6-10 weeks to take affect.  We have no idea how they even got there in the first place.

So…just for fun, I thought I’d send an email to AmEx because really, shouldn’t someone know about this?  I got some generic crappy response:

Please accept my sincere apology for the inconvenience and I have forwarded your email to the appropriate managers. Feedbacks from our Cardmembers represent valuable information about recurrent problems and American Express takes such feedbacks very seriously.

I appreciate you taking your valuable time to contact us about this matter.

I’m sure they don’t actually believe that they sent these to a dog and a cat.  Or maybe they’ll just miss the $95 annual fee.

I think the photo above about sums up my life the last few days.  I knew it was going to be a crazy week, especially with it being the last week of school.  Then…on Wednesday…it hit.  The mother-f’er of all migraines.  Well, at least the worst one I’ve had in a couple of years.

So basically, instead of spending two days working like crazy and balancing wrapping up things for my munchkin’s year-end party and playing with all the kids, I barfed every time I stood up.  For two days.  Every freakin’ time.  I didn’t even try to work.  I got the party plan done, handed it off to a trusted mommy in the class…and promptly left…walking while slumped over so I wouldn’t barf again.  I’ve had 2 trips to the doctor, at least 3 shots and lost 5 pounds.  Hmmm….maybe there is a bright side to this after all.  

So now…on my day “off”…I’m trying to catch up at work and a few things at home.  You know, like waiting for the delivery guy and the carpet cleaning guy (which meant moving all kinds of stuff around the house), both who were actually on time.  I had to clean the kitchen since it hadn’t been touched since pre-migraine.  I called the repair guy for the ice maker on the fridge and to get rid of the “floaties” in our water dispenser.  I called  the “dead animal” people to animal proof our deck.  

I’m also in box hell.  We have tons of boxes, ready to start packing to move some stuff to our vacation home, but that move-in date is slipping so I’ve been dragging my feet a bit on packing.

I get to pick up my munchkin early and take her to get her hair cut.  At least I canceled my 8am allergist appointment and decided against going to tonight’s baseball game so I could chill out a bit.

Our poor cat is freaking out with all sudden activity - and has decided that my hubby’s office is likely the only safe place left for him.  I guess I’d better break out the catnip, too.

Monthly Stats for May 2009:

• Monthly Miles:  6.87
• YTD Miles:  96.02

Pathetic, I know.  Between allergies and knee problems, I was sidelined most of the month.  However…I’m kicking off a new training program tomorrow and have signed up for a few more events.  I got in a short run yesterday and it just felt good.  I’ll see the allergist again on Friday - last time I saw him he said, “you’re a mess”.  We’re working on that.  As far as the knee, I’m giving it through the week before I decide what to do.  So far, so good.

So…I mentioned picking up a few of the iFit cards for my treadmill.  I ordered 3 back when I did the post - the lose weight series, levels 1-3.  They shipped soon enough - well, level 2 and 3 did.  I finally got level 1 over the weekend.

I should probably mention that I’ve never watched The Biggest Loser, so I have no idea what Jillian Michaels is like.  These came recommended to me and I wanted to try something new.

On the plus side, these are great little things to pop in when you don’t want to think about what type of workout you’ll do.  The card automatically does all the changes in speed and elevation for you.  I’m certainly going to get more hill work than I would do on my own.  

It’s pretty clear that Jillian wants to kick my ass.  Can’t you just tell by the look on her face?  I’ve had trainers before - great ones that inspired me (like Jon and Stephanie) and ones that yelled me (like when I went to Power Bodies…once).  The thing that cracks me up is that I’m happily zoning out on the workout and Jillian keeps talking to me…and I have been unable to find a way to adjust the volume so I don’t have to listen to her.  Even my iPod isn’t drowning her out.  That’s ok, Jillian…bring it on.  I’m keeping score.

• Jillian:  0     Tammy:  2

Monthly Stats for April 2009:

• Monthly Miles:  21.43
• YTD Miles:  89.15

Ok, nothing earth-shattering here.  I was still sick and just didn’t keep track of all the miles I surely did when I was at Disneyland for spring break.  Onward and upward!

Ok, you know how when kids are little and they do something wrong, you redirect them to an appropriate activity and hope it sticks?  Welcome to my world.  This time though, it’s me who needs redirecting.

I have been so frustrated lately.  I’ve been sick for 6 weeks now.  I’ve been on steroids for about a week and a half and all that’s happened is I’ve gained 5 pounds.  Seriously…those things are making me hungry and thirsty all the freakin’ time.  I’ve eaten stuff in the last week that I haven’t eaten in months.  And…it grosses me out.  Although I would never do the whole binge and purge thing, this week I’ve been pretty sympathetic to those who do.  I understood it…and that really bothered me.

I want to go for a run, but I can’t without putting myself into some sort of respiratory fit.  I’ve tried, repeatedly, and my lungs just aren’t ready.  Damn…damn…damn.

Leave it to Rockacito J to have words of wisdom, even if they took a few days to sink in.  He simply said, “walk…it will take time” and then, “you’ll get back…patience”.  Of course, I had to ask if I’d get back or if I’d get my patience back.  Lucky for me, he said both.

So…today…after woofing down three small pieces of pizza at lunch, I decided enough was enough.  Time to redirect.  As my munchkin was reading, I decided to try the sample iFit card that came with my treadmill.  It was only 20 minutes, and part of it was much slower than I was used to, but there were all sorts of speed and incline changes happening all the time that stopped it from being boring.  I realized that even though I can’t run right now, I can use it as an opportunity to do some hill work on the treadmill.  I felt so good after that, I decided to dust off my Total Gym and do some strength training too.  After an hour, I felt much, much better.  

Maybe I can’t run right now, but there are plenty of good things I can do.  I’m going to order some iFit cards to mix things up a bit.  I’m going to cut myself a little slack.  And most importantly, I’m going to thank Rockacito J for always being there for me and having my back, no matter how crazy I can get.  Thanks, J!

Monthly Stats for March 2009:

• Monthly Miles:  6.98
• YTD Miles:  67.72

Yes, I know I should have posted this on April Fool’s Day because it was a pathetic month.  In my defense, I got really sick and was pretty much horizontal for at least the first two weeks.  Then…between taking hubby to the ER, him getting surgery less than a week later, leaving the hospital early, taking him back to the ER and then his recovering, I was beat.  Besides, I’ve still had lots of respiratory problems and even just walking or gabbing on the phone was leaving me short of breath.  For those of you who have actually had conversations with me, imagine being able to get a word in edgewise more than usual because I was gasping (and not from what you said).  I’ve been to the doc three times in the last month and now we’ve thrown an arsenal of steroids at this illness.  I’m thinking tomorrow…will finally…be a run day.

Last week, we picked up another couple of Arthur books at our favorite local bookstore.  Arthur is pretty big in our house between being a well-loved show, owning about a dozen or so books and always seeming to check out more at the library.  While reading Arthur’s Birthday I was a little surprised that Spin the Bottle came up.  Twice.  You know what’s coming.

Munchkin:  Mommy, what’s Spin the Bottle?

Me:  Oh, it’s just a game.  (Start reading next page of book…)

Munchkin:  How do you play Spin the Bottle?

Me:  Let’s finish the book now and I’ll tell you later.  (Continue reading book…get to last page…damn…there’s a damn Spin the Bottle game in the picture!)

Munchkin:  See Mommy…Francine gave Spin the Bottle to Arthur.  How do you play?

Me:  Ummm…it’s a kissing game.  You need to be much older to play it.  

Munchkin:  A KISSING GAME?!?!?  How do you play???

Me:  (oh crap…) You spin a bottle and whoever it points to, you give them a kiss.

Munchkin:  You mean you KISS someone even if you’re not going to MARRY them?!?!?!?  

Me:  That’s why you wait until you’re much older to play.

Munchkin:  We can’t play that at school, Mommy.  There’s no kissing at school.  

Me:  That’s right.  No kissing at school.  (Whew?)

Munchkin:  So…we can still play, Mommy!  You, me and Daddy can play!  I can kiss you and Daddy.  Daddy can kiss you and me and you can kiss Daddy and me!  We can play Spin the Bottle!

Yeah, I’m waiting for that phone call from Child Protective Services.